Preparing for Secondary School
“How can they possibly be starting secondary school already?” is a common parental refrain heard far and wide in the lead up to this significant milestone. As parents and carers, we worry that our children are not ready, won’t cope and aren't able to look after themselves, all of which may be true to some extent. After all, transitioning from primary to secondary school is a landmark step in a child’s journey towards maturity and independence.
Moving from a smaller school in which everyone knows each other to a larger environment in which children are taught by several different teachers and in a number of different rooms can also bring its challenges. Many children become anxious about the shift from being a big fish in a little pond to the exact opposite.
At RocketEd, we think that the best way to ensure that children have a positive start to secondary school is to prepare them carefully in advance for the changes they will face.
Making the Transition
Many primary schools begin the transition process in Year 5, encouraging and nudging children to become more self-reliant as learners, to begin to think about how to organise themselves and manage their time, to learn how to research and evaluate their work and to take the next steps in their learning or self-management. Usually, children in Years 5 and 6 are given greater responsibility in school and expected to make a greater contribution to life of their school and community. Through this, they can develop commitment, learn organisational skills and a strengthen the sense of personal responsibility, all of which will stand them in very good stead for secondary school.
Helping Them Make the Leap
There are lots of things parents can do to prepare their children to take on increased responsibility, cope when things don’t go to plan and become more independent.
Parents should practise the parental mindshift. When things go wrong, it's instinctive for us to want to make it right. That’s usually the way things go when the child is at primary school where schools seek and encourage regular communication with parents as decision-makers. At secondary school, however, young people rather than their parents are placed in the driving seat as agents of their own destiny. So, from transition to secondary school, parents must get into the habit of stepping back. One way they might do this is by encouraging young people to sort minor issues out by themselves. Of course even the toughest pre-teen needs help and support, but the key message here is not to stand between the young person and the outside world.
There are lots of other things parents and carers can do, too. Here are 8 ways to prepare your child for secondary school.
Encourage their independence. Leave them on their own at home for short periods, making sure they know what to do or who to contact in an emergency. Take your child and a friend into town, arrange to meet them in an hour and let them go off by themselves. Encourage them to go to the local shop to get things needed at home, and get them used to dealing with money.
Practise the journey. Help them to practise the exact journey to school, first with you and then alone. Give them instructions on ‘what to do if…’ and ‘who to contact if…’ so that they have a plan if things don’t go as expected.
Agree phone boundaries in advance so everyone is clear what the limitations and expectations are. Learning to use a phone is a life skill in itself: how to budget time, operate within boundaries and use with care and consideration as well as not actually lose the phone! It's reassuring for parents and children to know that they can reach each other in an emergency but care must be taken to ensure they do not over rely on technology to the detriment of safety, interaction independence.
Understand potential causes of anxiety. The transition from being a big fish in a small pond to a small fish in a big pond is scary. Attending school with young adults, changes of friends, increase of responsibilities. Tune in to what might be worrying your child so that you can help them navigate and work through problems as they arise.
Set the tone for learning. Encourage them to keep track of their own homework including being responsible for remembering to take it to school on the right day. It helps if they can get into the habit of not leaving homework until the last minute. In the Summer before September, get them set up with a good, quiet workspace and places to store the things they need. Consider buying them a laptop if you can stretch to that.
Teach them about timekeeping. Get into the habit of asking your child to keep an eye on the clock and let you know when it's time to go. Sometimes they’ll forget and make everyone late, but hopefully they’ll experience consequences (such as getting sanctioned or not liking the feeling of cutting it fine) and learn to keep better time.
Increase their understanding of travelling safely. They may need to be taught how to safely cross busy roads, reminded about how to manage expensive possessions when out in the community and understand who (and who not) to approach if help is needed.
Organising and remembering things. Aside from those with organisation difficulties for whom other strategies will be more effective, you might want to teach that what they lose won’t be replaced. Losing a favourite item is a good way many of us have learned how to keep track of our things and look after them.
